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Friday, July 13, 2018

Do you know any Foster Families?

Almost everyone knows of at least one family who foster children.  There is a huge need in most parts of the United States for foster parents. The main goal of foster parenting is to provide the child love, safety and everything a normal healthy family has until their own family can be reunited.

If you are wanting to help a foster family out, I have some suggestions and ideas.

First off, foster families do NOT make money or earn their living fostering children.  You have to be able to prove to the state that you can support the children without the state payments.  In my area  the payments depend on the age of the child, but are mostly in the $200s per month.  Here, they also qualify for free insurance, childcare, and free school breakfasts and lunch.  Foster parents get a once a year allowance of $250 for their clothing.  Some children are not with you for a year.

During the time foster kids are in a foster family home they are kids.  Just kids.  They are not labeled as "foster kids".  It is not your business to know the kids background, parents or why they are in foster care.  Respect that.  During this time, they are to be treated as normal kids.  If you invite them over for Christmas, have a gift for them as you would for any other child.  Some of these kids may have severe behavior issues.  Respect how the foster parents address that.  Yes, you may do differently with your own children, but many of these kids have been thru various types of trauma and so discipline is very different.  Don't loudly announce what you would do or intervene unless asked to do so.

Foster kids usually arrive in care with nothing, or just a few things in a trash bag.  So, the family must get everything for them, usually at their own expense--underwear, socks, shoes, clothing, bedding (for each child placement you have you need either generic bedding or a boy set and a girl set, and extra of each for sicknesses and accidents) What has been given to that child becomes theirs.  So, when they move back home, their clothes and toys are theirs to take.


Foster families could use gift cards to take the family out to dinner once in awhile, even if only to McDonalds.   Movie gift cards are also nice.  Also, they could use gift cards to places such as Walmart, grocery stores, perhaps a family pool pass, give them gifts of coloring books and crayons, play dough, age appropriate toys, gas cards as the family will be taking the child to counseling, therapy and such quite often.

Pick and date with the mom and provide a meal for them after asking about food allergies.

When around foster children.  Set a good example, use a clean mouth, don't get angry or upset.

If you notice the family has a new placement, ask if there is anything they need.

Offer to pay the way for a child to go to camp.

Donate music lessons, voice or dance lessons......Buy their scout uniform, help the family at Christmas.

See if your church has a foster ministry.  If not, set one up with a clothing closet, baby equipment, new shoes, new socks and new underwear, good luggage.  Start a fund at your church  to help foster families with expenses, such as needing to repair walls or repaint between placements, or clothing, band instruments, yearbooks, class rings, letter jackets, school supplies and backpacks....


Make it known to the foster mom that if they get a late night placement, you are more than willing to run to the store to her to get what she may be lacking (such as formula, change of clothing for an older child.)   Then, if you do so, don't announce it to everyone.


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